Parenting Through the Big Talks

Having ‘those’ Conversations

When it comes to important and often sensitive topics—like sexuality —who your child hears from first makes a lasting impact. Experts agree: the first voice on a topic often becomes the most trusted one in a child’s mind. That voice should be yours.

You want your child to learn biblical truth from you before they encounter the confusion and lies of our culture. You want them to know that you are their safest and most reliable source for answers. That means teaching your child/ren what God’s Word says about these things and being ready to have open, honest conversations—get ready to practice that non-shocked ‘poker face’!

As much as we’d probably rather our kids didn’t have to be exposed to some of these things this is an incredible opportunity to begin training your child to know what they believe—and why. Scripture calls us to “Always be ready to tell everyone who asks you why you believe as you do. Be gentle as you speak and show respect.” (1 Peter 3:15 NLV).

Stay informed about what your child’s school or other voices in their lives are teaching through asking questions, spending time with them and being interested in their world. That way, you can help them process and evaluate what they are being taught and exposed to. It’s ok if they challenge what you’re saying. As much as we sometimes don’t like this as parents, they are learning to think for themselves and this is a God-given gift. Ask the Holy Spirit for help as you have these conversations and to give you wisdom as you navigate these things.

A helpful resource for guiding these conversations is the God’s Design for Sex series by Stan and Brenna Jones. These books teach biblically on sexuality while also including teaching on Homosexuality, Abortion, Co-habiting and Transsexualism in a loving and truthful way.

Online Safety

This is also usually a time when parents hand their kids phones. Phones come with their own challenges! Before handing your child a phone ask yourself these questions:

Am I giving them a phone because I’m sick of them asking for one, because their friends have one, or because they are genuinely ready for this responsibility?
Are online safety checks in place?
Have I communicated my expectations for their phone use/safety, what apps are allowed and what happens if they violate these expectations?
Are they aware of things like pornography and do they know to respond when they encounter this or other online harms?
Are they aware that social media users on most apps need to be 13+ and 16+ is recommended by experts.

This is a reasonably new area for parents to navigate and one that is always developing. Keep an eye out for our next Online Safety Masterclass.

As we continue exploring this topic, we’re unpacking a key tension in the Christian life: why we still struggle with sin even though Jesus has already defeated it. Read the notes below to understand what Christ has done at the cross, what we experience today, and how God is shaping us through the ongoing journey of sanctification.

The Power of Sin

Overview
The Defeat of Sin’s Power
The Struggle with Sin’s Influence
Why We Still Struggle With Sin
The Victory We Can Have Over Sin
Conclusion

Overview

Many of us understand that when Jesus gave His life on the cross, He defeated the power and authority of sin. He became sin in our place so that we might become the righteousness of God in Him (2 Corinthians 5:21).

Yet, it’s clear that sin is still present in the world, and many Christians still struggle with temptation and sinful habits. This can feel confusing. If sin has been defeated in Christ, why do we still struggle with it?

In this blog, we’ll explore:

The defeat of sin’s power at the cross
The ongoing influence of sin
Why believers still struggle today
How we can walk in victory over sin

The Defeat of Sin’s Power

At the cross, Jesus didn’t just deal with sin emotionally or symbolically. He broke its authority and dominion over believers completely.

We are no longer slaves to sin.

Romans 6:6–11 explains this clearly:

Our old self was crucified with Him so that the body of sin might be brought to nothing, so that we would no longer be enslaved to sin.

This is a decisive spiritual reality for everyone in Christ:

Sin no longer rules over us
We are no longer under its authority
We are now alive to God in Christ Jesus

Before salvation, sin wasn’t just something we did. It was something that ruled us. Paul uses the image of slavery to explain this:

“You were once slaves of sin…” (Romans 6:17–18)

A slave does not have full autonomy. In the same way, sin shaped our desires, decisions, and direction before Christ.

Freedom through Christ’s exchange.

Jesus broke that system through His death and resurrection:

“For our sake He made Him to be sin who knew no sin…” (2 Corinthians 5:21)

Through Christ’s sacrifice:

We are freed from sin’s power
We are transferred into righteousness
Sin is no longer our master

But this leads to an important question: If sin is defeated, why do we still struggle?

The Struggle with Sin’s Influence

Although sin’s power has been broken, its presence and influence remain in the world.

Sin is no longer our master, but it still tries to tempt, lure, and influence us. We still live in a fallen world where spiritual battle is real.

Even Jesus experienced temptation, yet He never sinned.

Scripture is clear that believers must still actively resist sin:

Ephesians 6:10–12 – We wrestle against spiritual forces
1 Peter 5:8 – The devil seeks to devour
James 1:13–14 – Temptation comes through desire

We are still in a spiritual battle

While sin no longer rules us, it still:

Appeals to our flesh
Uses external influences
Seeks to draw us away from God

However, sin will not always remain. Scripture promises a future where it will be completely removed:

“He will wipe away every tear… death shall be no more…” (Revelation 21:4)

Why We Still Struggle With Sin

To understand the tension we live in, we need to understand the three stages of salvation (Ordo Salutis):

Justification

We are saved instantly

Freed from sin’s power
Declared righteous in Christ

2. Sanctification

We are being saved progressively

Freed from sin’s influence over time
Becoming more like Christ

3. Glorification

We will be saved fully in the future

Completely free from sin’s presence

Where we live now

We currently live in sanctification:

Sin’s power is broken
Sin’s influence is still present
Sin’s presence will one day be removed

State of sin vs acts of sin

A helpful distinction:

State of sin: We are no longer separated from God
Acts of sin: We still sometimes fall and miss the mark

Being saved does not mean we never sin again. It means sin no longer defines our identity or separates us from God.

We are:

Fully forgiven in Christ
Still being transformed in daily life

The Victory We Can Have Over Sin

We are not powerless against temptation. Scripture gives us practical ways to walk in victory.

1. Identify the sin

You cannot overcome what you refuse to acknowledge.

2. Understand there is no condemnation

“There is now no condemnation for those in Christ Jesus.” (Romans 8:1)

Conviction leads us to God. Condemnation pushes us away from Him.

3. Recognise triggers

Identify patterns and remove environments that fuel temptation.

4. Repent quickly

“If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just…” (1 John 1:9)

Don’t delay restoration.

5. Bring sin into the light

Confession breaks secrecy. Sin grows in darkness and weakens in the light.

6. Remember your identity

You fight sin from freedom, not for freedom.

“Be transformed by the renewal of your mind…” (Romans 12:2)

7. Rely on the Holy Spirit

Change is a process empowered by God, not human willpower alone.

“He who began a good work in you will bring it to completion…” (Philippians 1:6)

Conclusion

Jesus has defeated sin, but sin has not yet been fully destroyed.

That is why:

We are free from sin’s power
We still face its influence
We still experience the process of sanctification

One day, at glorification, sin will be gone completely. Until then, we live in the tension of already free, but still being transformed.

The good news is this:

Sin does not define you
Sin does not separate you from God
Sin does not have authority over your life

You are justified, being sanctified, and one day will be glorified.

And in the meantime, the Holy Spirit is faithfully shaping you into the image of Christ.

Flourish

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